Friendship and Steadfastness

One thing shelter in place has given me is a deep appreciation for consistent practices with friends.

These rituals have taken two flavors — the kind I get to practice up close with friends I’m sheltering with, and the kind practiced at a distance.

Up close

I did and didn’t know all of the holes that I had in my life here before SIP. I’ll save thoughts on this for another time.

My favorite up close ritual has been the weeknight dinner. My roommates and I have agreed to take a shift each weeknight (it helps that I live with so many other people) to cook dinner. I don’t know when I last ate this well. But more importantly, I haven’t sat down with the same people day over day, week over week, to share a meal in a really long time. Because my parents worked the evening shift when I was young, and then I went to boarding school, the “classic” meal around the dinner table has never been a reality for me. Until now.

My roommates have shown consistency in other ways, too. Patty and I have done HIIT workouts every Tuesday and Thursday since SIP went in place, and because of Leila’s consistent encouragement to play with her pull-up bar in the middle of the day, I can now almost do 6 pull-ups in a row (two months ago I could barely do one).

My up-close friends have also made space in their hearts to listen to endless stories about my dreams, for which I will be ever thankful. I don’t deserve you.

At a distance

The biggest thing to say here is that my expectations have been exceeded. Some of my favorite new rituals have been

  • Watching premieres of Insecure
  • Reading through Habakkuk and discussing lament / evil in our world with the ladies in my small group
  • Virtual walks through Noe Valley (and up my favorite outdoor staircase in SF)
  • End of work day Zooms with friends from different parts of life (always zoom bc the wifi in my house is trash)

The simple beauty of steadfastness has been a gift to me in this season. An expression of love not quite like physical touch, but one that’s starting to feel pretty close.

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